I was researching some totally unrelated subject – a really old Mercedes if you must know, I don’t have a single track mind – when my attention was caught by the image above and I found a singletrack geek.

Mountain biking was never my thing, though having about a bazillion gears to get up some of San Francisco’s streets could be useful even for walkers, but I do love this geek’s straight eye for curvey girls.

He seems to have gone off the air, with the last post dated about June 22. A pity. Anyways, if you want to run through his archives, maybe skip the cycling videos, it’s worth the trip!

— Guy Sez

There’s no doubt about it – San Francisco is the most beautiful city in all the world. A little known fact is that the beauty is enhanced on a regular basis, with unclad women strolling around, exploring the city, teasing the sealions at Fishermans Wharf, amusing the tourists at Coit Tower, teetering down Lombard in heels…

My favorite spot to look at the world is up on the Fort Mason headland, with the bridge stretching out over to Marin’s golden hills, and Alcatraz sailing through the bay, but I guess my attention can always be diverted!

I love this site: Nude in San Francisco. Every week a model (or two) explore a different part of our ever more delightful city. We shouldn’t worry about spending a fortune on tourism promotions – just make this the official city hall website, and we’ll have no worries at all!

Seriously, this is a fun site. Quite apart from the lovely ladies wandering about wearing nothing but a smile or two, San Francisco’s sights are always worth a look, and the reactions of tourists and locals alike are priceless. I don’t know which I enjoy more – the blasé seen-it-all-just-getting-about-my-business fake nonchalance, or the jaw-dropped OMFG-she’s-nekkid! delighted stare. Or the occasional matronly disapproval – don’t look at that bimbo, dear!

Another big My GF Sez tick is that these shoots are not porno. They are genuine. No flash at dawn on a lonely beach, no “money shot” up Lombard Street. These are women walking around San Francisco, as natural as can be. The photographs are revealing, but not overly intimate – just the way I like ‘em!

Check it out. Maybe I should post regular reviews of the NISF shoots here, like I’m doing with Abby Winters?

— Guy Sez

Here’s a delightful – and thoughtful – blog post by my second favorite sex nerd, Emily Nagoski, on lovely things you can do with a sleeping beauty.

Favorite line:

You can rub your genitals against his, noticing and reveling in the unique sensation provided by flaccidity. Soft penises are fun!

Right on, Emily!

She keeps a cool blog, and when she includes a photograph, it’s a ripper!

My favorite sex nerd? The young lady who wrote Bonk, which had me hooting with laughter on a packed flight between DFW and SFO. Mary Roach, who has now written a bunch of books on weird subjects, all informative and hilarious.

These two women should get together and do the ultimate educational funny sex video – fully clothed with puppets, maybe.

—Guy Sez

Sleepy doggie pic by mexikids

Grl has given me a poetry book, and it has inspired me to verse. “You mean ‘worse’,” observes Grl, reading my first attempt.

I don’t know. There are some dodgy efforts in the book:

A mathematician named Hall,
Has a hexagonal ball,
the cube of its weight,
Times his pecker plus eight,
Is his phone number – give him a call!

Hmmm. An equation with too many variables for me to solve.

A Southern hillbilly named Hollis
Used possums and snakes as his solace;
His offspring had scales
And prehensile tails,
And voted for Governor Wallace.

That one whipped right over young Grl’s head.

I heard of a story so fraught
With disaster, of balls that got caught,
When a chap took a crap
In the woods, and a trap
Underneath… oh, I can’t bear the thought!

That made me wince!

I could go on for ages. There are funny ones, sad ones, ones that make your eyes water, ones that have you flailing around on the floor helpless with laughter. But my favorite limerick of all time, sometimes proclaimed as the world’s best, is this one:

There was a young plumber of Leigh
Was plumbing his girl by the sea.
Cried the girl, “Cease your plumbing!
“I think someone’s coming!”
Said the plumber, still plumbing, “It’s me!”

And let me end as I began, with one of my own:

Skinny milk, fake frankfurts, soy cheeses;
My diet has nothing that pleases.
But even a wafer
In church is no safer,
I can’t believe it’s not Jesus!

—Guy Sez

The shoot is from August 17, 2005, back in the days before high definition video streaming. The fifteen minutes of footage is divided into three segments, each of around 35 megabytes. The picture quality is good for the day, but not the sort of thing you’d put up on the big screen to see every curly hair sharply detailed.

Mind, there’s a lot of curls to be admired. Three models, each firm and taut. Dark-haired Ivana, short and bubbly, blonde Lana C, and tall, red-haired, ginger-bushed Isabel.

Isabel owns this video. For one thing, she’s instructing the other two on salsa dancing, with its sensuous shimmies and rolls. She knows her stuff and she gives it to the viewer confidently. But mostly, it’s the way she looks. Cute baby face, sparkling eyes and a smiling mouth. Tall and slender, the incredible length of her legs extended with heels so high you gasp at how she can possibly dance on them. Her breasts are pert and every jiggle of her sweet nipples is something to sigh for. Long red hair drawn back in a ponytail, and a ginger muff you could lose yourself in.

The other two girls are easy on the eyes, small firm breasts, trim bodies, generous hips, but it’s Isabel’s show all the way through.

The setting is casual. One element of the Abby Winters flavor is that there’s not a lot of work done in professionally-decorated studios with big lights and artful backdrapes. Here we are in what looks like a country church hall. Bare wooden floorboards, wooden walls cheaply painted, an open window. A wooden bench, a cheap upright piano and a red fire extinguisher hanging by the doorway. There’s a backstage shot that shows the set halfway through the shoot.

But we’re not here to admire the furniture. All we need are the girls.

“I’m going to teach you the basics”, says Isabel, “then we’re going to jazz it up.”

Isabel is in a little black dress perched atop those fabulous legs, Ivana is in cute pink floral shorts and a top, and Lana has a skirt and a snug fitting light green top to complement her medium blondeness.

“You know how to shimmy?” Isabel asks her students, and they wiggle their upper bodies dutifully.

“Now we’re going to thrust and roll,” and they practice this. Just watching three beautiful women move their bodies in such a way is exciting enough, but you know it’s going to get better.

And very soon it does.

“This is where you follow my example as the teacher,” Isabel smiles. “Take off your clothes!”

“One – two, one – two – three,” she calls the time, wiggling her little black dress up and over her head.

And her students follow along, drawing with them my delighted eyes.

“Whenever in doubt, take off all your clothes!” I can’t argue with Isabel on this point, and I’m beginning to see how she fits right into the Abby Winters experience with this attitude.

Before any more clothes are removed, there’s a minute or so of upper-body shimmying to admire. From now on, when I think of salsa, it’s not going to be a chunky sauce that I dip my corn chips in for a snack. This is a feast for the eyes.

And it gets tastier, soon enough.

“One thing to make it even sexier,” Isabel smiles, “is to take off our underwear!”

“One – two – three,” she counts, hooking her thumbs in her panties and dropping them a few inches each time she shifts her hips. They hit the floor at the count of eight, and she stands in her glory, ginger above and below, elegant and cool, comfortable in her nudity.

Before the happy viewer has caught his breath, her two students are counting their panties down in unison, hips and legs wiggling saucily.

And there they stand, three gorgeous young naked women with ten minutes of salsa dance video ahead.

But it’s the final seconds of the first clip that makes it. Isabel’s underwear gets tangled in her heels as she tries to smoothly kick them off, and she hops on one leg, breasts doing their own sweet salsa, knees flying apart and a smile on her lips.

The second clip, five minutes and fifty-seven seconds of it, is pure pleasure. There are two cameras capturing the action: a fixed mount taking in the dance lesson, and a hand-held moving around, occasionally its microphone protruding into the main shot. I live for these mobile close-ups, zooming in on thighs and buttocks, breasts and bellies. It has a slightly warmer color setting than the fixed camera, putting more life into the live dance.

“Shimmy with the shoulders, then shimmy with the bum,” our teacher advises. The word “bum” is Australian for “ass”, it turns out. There is plenty of shimmying and twirling, three sexy women turning in unison. Before you know it, the clip is over and you are loading the third and final in the sequence, where it all comes together with a lot of giggling and jiggling. This is as much fun to watch as it must be for the three laughing, whirling women. The mobile camera looks closely at girl curves in motion, and there’s a wonderful thirty seconds towards the end, where the camera peeks through parted legs, flashes of merry bushes bouncing and dancing for our pleasure.

The final seconds are a round of applause and three low bows for the camera. You ever look down the top of a dancer bowing low at the end of her performance? Of course you did. Well, here are the bows without the tops. Enjoy!

“Encore, encore!” I applauded, but that was it, I’m afraid. Each model is the subject of one or more separate shoots, but nothing to match this session for fun.
—Guy Sez

I hate to throw around terms like “the best shoot ever” since i just know i’m going to be reminded of some shoot or other that has temporarily escaped my mind, but at the moment of writing this seems to be the best shoot i’ve seen, simply because it combines apparent genuine enjoyment on the model’s part with pleasure on the eye of the viewer, and in addition teaches a bit of something about Salsa. Deustopaz from Iowa City

Shoot: Salsa Girls
Date: August 17, 2005
Models: Isabel, Ivana, Lana C
Backstage: Images 81 – 111
Crew: Verity and Jamie

Clip 1: 5:42, 46.7 MB
3:30 – Tops off
4:50 – Bottoms off
5:35 – Isabel gets tangled in underwear

Clip 2: 5:57, 48.8 MB

Clip 3: 5:57, 49.0MB
3:16 – mobile cam in shot

Discussion: Salsa Girls

Bonus: Tribute to Isabel

Grl: Guy! So nice to see you!

Guy: Yeah you too! I’ve been missing you.

Grl: been missing you too, work’s been crazy busy *long slow kiss to make up for it*

Guy: Mmmmmm. *tastes Grl’s tongue* So hard with you on the road. *runs tongue over lips* Mmmmm, barbecue.

Grl: …*sigh* I know. Jeez I miss you.

Guy: You know I want to do a post on chatsex?

Grl: yeah, I had noticed

Guy: I was wondering how we should approach it. For example, half the fun of a good chatsex session is the setting. I remember that time on a plane, in coach, redeye flight to Chicago. *wraps blanket over us*

Grl: mmmm that was fun! I still can’t believe the person sitting next to us didn’t hear anything!

Guy: *quietly undoes safety belt* We were very quiet.

Grl: *follows your example*

Guy: The crew were in the galley, doing crew things. *slides hand under blanket* Nobody noticed.

Grl: *grabbing your hand and squeezing it* Thank heavens! I might be open, but I’m not that open!

Guy: *squeezes Grl’s hand* Just holding hands is fun with you. We could just chatcuddle if you want.*slides hand around a bit under blanket*

Grl: mmm remember that time coming home from the airport?

Grl: nah, I’m too turned on to just cuddle now!

Guy: Oh, good! *hand explores under blanket* Interesting shapes under loose flight clothing.

Grl: yeah it’s all those layers of clothing I can’t fit in my suitcase anymore!  *cursing layers*

Guy: It made it difficult. Especially the oral part. Can’t believe nobody noticed.

Grl: yeah, specially with all my moaning and your heavy breathing!

Guy: *breathing heavily*

Grl: *stretching up for a kiss*

Guy: *kisses Grl with intent* I love the way you taste.

Grl: *hand creeping down*

Guy: The beauty of a good chatsex session is that you aren’t constrained by physical restrictions. Of clothing or cramped coach seats.

Grl: or the person sitting next to us Or that we weren’t even sitting remotely near each other

Guy: Or that it was a day flight. Still, we can relive the experience the way it should have been. *exploring hand at last finds some skin*

Grl: yeah, in a perfect world… *sharp breath in*

Guy: Sorry. I think that was your shoulder - I was hunting for a nipple. Ah. I wonder what happens if I press this button.

Grl: really? I could’ve sworn it was my belly!

Guy: Hard to tell in the dark, under a blanket in cramped seats. All good. *presses button* Oh look, the moon is full, the blanket is under us, the waves are crashing onto the tropic beach, the palms are waving above us in the mellow night sky. And we’re all alone. Just us. *undoes top button*

Grl: *smelling the salt air* mmmmmm

Guy: *admiring Grl* You are beautiful. *kisses Grl again*

Guy: *and again*

Guy: *undoes a few more buttons* Not as many layers of clothing in this scenario. Still, it’s fun to slowly undress you.

Grl: mmm just you wait till you hit my bathing suit. THEN you’ll be gasping! *giving a helping hand*

Guy: I’m gasping already! *removes Grl’s top and admires well-filled costume beneath*

Grl:

Guy: Just wearing board shorts myself. Getting uncomfortably tight around the front bulge area.

Grl: I can help with that *gently stroking bulge*

Guy: Yikes! The problem’s growing!

Grl: mmmmmm *sliding hand down shorts*

Guy: I’m not talking fantasy now. I wish you were doing that for real!

Grl: :D:D:D:D:D

Guy: *ignores growing tension down below*

Guy: *slides fingers over Lycra bathing suit*

Guy: *feeling interesting shapes*

Guy: The full moonlight highlights the curves. I can see clearly what is shoulder, what is belly, and what is breast. *tickles nipple through thin cloth*

Grl: Is it full tide? Cos I’m getting really wet

Guy: *slides hand downstairs*

Guy: Sure that bathing suit isn’t chafing? *Undoes cord on board shorts*

Guy: *begins wriggling free*

Grl: *grabbing your hand to stop you*

Grl: *kissing you hard*

Guy: *tasting the salt on Grl’s lips, feeling them warm and full and soft*

Grl: *sliding your shorts off*

Guy:*feeling the warm tropic air*

Guy: *rising to salute the moon*

Grl: *sitting on you and kissing you hard again*

Guy: mmmmm. *begins peeling the clinging, stretch fabric down over shoulders*

Grl: *nipples getting hard*

Guy: I can see them, trying to escape! Here, let me help! *rolls top down*

Guy: *admires perfect breasts in the pale moonlight* nipples jumping and bouncing on top, glad to be out in the open.

Grl: *kissing you again*

Grl: can you tell I like kissing

Guy: Oh yeah! Can you tell I like…

Guy: *strokes Grl’s skin* Lips, cheeks, chin, throat, shoulders. *softly, caressing, lovingly working the way down*

Grl: *breathing harder all of a sudden*

Guy: *still kissing Grl*

Guy: *breathing faster*

Grl: *heart racing*

Grl: *sliding down your body to lightly tease your cock*

Guy: *moans*

Grl: *grins*

Grl: *peeling bathing suit completely off*

Guy: *moans louder* OMG, you are beautiful! A goddess in the moonlight!

Grl: *kissing you hard*

Grl: *tongue sliding into your mouth*

Guy: *sliding fingers gently down, over shoulders, over arms*

Grl: *gasping*

Guy: *tracing the outlines of your upper body*

Guy: *backs of hands gently touching sides of breasts, almost by accident*

Grl: *kissing down the side of your neck*

Guy: *feeling nipples hard against my hands*

Guy: *stroking breasts, circling in on each side, fingers climbing those rounded slopes*

Guy: *reaching the little peaks at the centre, feeling them crinkle under his gentle touch*

Guy: *bends down to kiss them*

Grl: *kissing down your shoulder, down to your nipple, down, down, down*

Guy: *nibbling Grl’s nipples, circling them with tongue strokes*

Grl: oh god

Guy: Funny, I was thinking the same thing… Don’t you love the way that in chat, there’s no awkwardness as hands, mouths, tongues, bodies writhe and move into impossible positions?

Grl: mmm yeah!

Grl: *feeling nipples get even harder*

Grl: *moaning*

Guy: *kissing even harder*

Guy: *moves hands down, gliding lightly over the delighting curves of breasts and tummy*

Grl: *getting wetter and wetter*

Guy: *circling lower, feeling the first soft curls under his fingers*

Guy: *stroking down onto thighs*

Guy: *feeling the smooth shapes of legs, the angles of knees, the trim calves, the toes, taking time to tickle each one*

Grl: tease *kissing you hard again*

Grl: *sliding down over bump to kneel over your legs*

Guy: *responding to the kiss*

Guy: *growing harder yet*

Grl: *taking you in my mouth*

Guy: Oh my god! *closes eyes in delight*

Grl: *wondering what to do next* :p

Guy: It’s all good here. ;D

Grl: *s-l-o-w-l-y dragging lips down*

Guy: *hands moving back up legs, tracing the contours, teasing the inner thighs*

Guy: *tickling your fancy*

Guy: Gently, lightly touching just the curls.

Guy: At first…

Guy: *Stroking the triangular outlines, just lightly touching the skin*

Grl: *tongue teasing, tantalizing*

Grl: *taking your hands in mine*

Grl: *holding them still*

Guy: *enjoying the sensations of lips and tongue on me here, and the feel of female curves under my hands there*

Grl: *dragging lips up again and off completely*

Grl: *tongue circling tip*

Grl: *sliding in to you as far as I can*

Grl: *putting you back into my mouth*

Grl: *tongue moving around inside mouth*

Grl: you still there?

Guy: Oh yeah!

Guy: Wondering what to do with his hands…

Guy: Thinking of something…

Guy: *gently eases thighs apart*

Guy: *softly but firmly, unticklingly, strokes the curving shapes of outer lips*

Guy: *tracing their outlines, feeling the curls against his fingers, the soft, smooth surfaces of inner lips*

Guy: *Gently touching, sliding along the skin, slick with girl juice*

Guy: *Moves around, kissing his way down*

Grl: *coming up to kiss you again*

Guy: *meet’s Grl’s lips halfway*

Guy: *tasting the salty tang*

Guy: *holding you close*

Guy: *embracing Grl, skin to skin, head to toe*

Guy: *heart pounding*

Grl: *sliding a finger inside myself, then putting it in your mouth while we kiss*

Guy: Oh yes! Mmmmmmm. Tangy. Tasty. *sucks on finger*

Grl: *kissing the side of your mouth, then continuing to kiss around to your ear while you suck my finger*

Guy: *feeling Grl blow in ear* I hear the sea!

Guy: *takes Grl’s hand, moves it down, down, all the way down* Say hello to the boys! But don’t squeeze them too hard!

Guy: *slides his own hand way down*

Grl: *nibbling your ear lobe* :p

Guy: *slides one finger inside*

Guy: *gently*

Guy: *moves it around*

Guy: *moves it out*

Guy: *tracing the soft folds*

Guy: *finding that little bean of pleasure*

Guy: *stroking it softly with moist finger tip*

Guy: *smooth, gentle touches*

Grl: *deep sharp breath*

Grl: *gently tickling balls*

Guy: *breathing hard* Oh yes!

Guy: *moves down*

Guy: *kissing his way down*

Guy: *all the way down*

Grl: *toes curling*

Guy: *kissing into the triangle of curls*

Guy: *tongue seeking out the tender, tangy, places*

Guy: *kissing, licking, softly at first*

Guy: *tongue touching, stroking, caressing clitoris*

Guy: *darting inside*

Grl: oh god oh god ohgod *arching up for more contact*

Guy: *pushing harder*

Guy: *kissing away, away up*

Guy: *sliding himself in*

Guy: *feeling the grip inside*

Guy: The most intimate of caresses, enjoying every inch of the journey.

Grl: *crying out*

Guy: *thrusting slowly, all the way in*

Guy: *holding it a moment*

Guy: *pulling back*

Guy: *And in again*

Guy: *feeling the pleasure, the exquisite pleasure*

Guy: *gently, firmly thrusting in a slow rhythm*

Guy: Matching the waves on the beach. We’re on a beach, there’s a blanket under us, the warm air is caressing our skin and we have the island to ourselves and all the time in the world.

Guy: *pushing in and out, a steady tempo*

Grl: *feeling you inside me*

Grl: *kissing you hard*

Grl: *and again*

Grl: *and again*

Grl: *and again*

Grl: *over and over*

Guy: *responding to kisses*

Guy: sweet kisses in the silver moonlight

Guy: *continuing a steady stroke*

Guy: *pushing down, pressure on clitoris as well*

Guy: *Making every movement count for the maximum in shared pleasure*

Grl: *getting closer to that edge*

Guy: The pressure is building for me. *pushing on, sweet sensations growing*

Grl: *fingers busy here*

Guy: *Thrusting quicker now, in and down*

Guy: The waves seem to be rolling in, crashing ashore, the universe moving faster as we move in harmony.

Guy: *feeling the exquisite pleasure with every rhythmic movement of our shared bodies moving as one*

Guy: *Sliding in and out, surfing the rising pleasure*

Grl: *inches from the edge*

Guy: *feeling Grl moan and tense and writhe under him*

Guy: *loving her with every breath, every beat of his racing heart*

Guy: *holding her close, every inch of her body, every point of pleasure, every pore in her skin*

Grl: *moaning loudly*

Guy: *breathing hard*

Guy: *thrusting in, sliding in, filling her up*

Guy: *pushing on and on, breath in gasps, heart in harness*

Guy: *moving together in a race, two working as one, hearts and limbs entwined*

Guy: *each feeling the other’s every move, every thrust, every precious pressure*

Guy: *temperature soaring, skins slick with sweat*

Grl: *crying out*

Guy: The feeling is unstoppable, the rythmn pounding

Guy: Working together, breath coming in shorter and shorter gasps.

Guy: *thrusting, grinding, riding, moving together in a dance of joy*

Grl: *can’t think mind off in space body in exquisite pleasure*

Guy: *unstoppable waves of pleasure pulsing through me*

Guy: *arches back in a climax of ecstasy*

Guy: *gasping at the pleasure*

Guy: *gulping in air to cool his body, furnace-hot in the tropic night*

Guy: *slowing and stopping, just pressing down*

Guy: *enjoying the aftertingles*

Guy: *feeling the shared bliss*

Guy: *holds Grl close, this most intimate embrace*

Grl: *breathing gradually slowing down*

Guy: *feeling the shared warmth*

Guy: *rolls out, lies gasping*

Guy: *smiling*

Guy: happy beyond belief

Guy: *holding Grl’s hand*

Guy: *touching her fingers*

Guy: *feeling so close, so loving, so happy*

Grl: *bringing your hand to my mouth and kissing it*

Guy: *kissing Grl’s hand*

Guy: *sighs in happiness*

Guy: *looking at Grl’s loving face*

Guy: this is heaven

Grl: mmmmmmmm

Guy: you are amazing

Grl: I love you

Guy: I love you

Grl: enjoy?

Guy: Oh yes

Guy: We’ll have to do that chatsex post one day, you know. It won’t write itself!

FunkyBrownChick.com

• Blog Name: FunkyBrownChick
• Type: Lifestyle
• Level: Spicey
• Author: Twanna A Hines
• Location: New York City
• First Post: June 21, 2005
• Popularity: “On a good day, upwards of 3,000+ people visit this site. Funky Brown Chick isn’t huge. It isn’t extremely tiny either.”
• Platform: WordPress

My name is Twanna and I own Funky Brown Chick.
All rights reserved. So, please, don’t be a dick.

Guy Sez: You gotta love someone with a copyright notice like that one!

Perhaps the best introduction is FunkyBrownChick’s own words in her first post:

let’s see … this is the first entry so i should probably tell you more about myself. i’m somewhat new to new york, but i’m used to big cities. i’m black; hence, the “brown” in funky brown chick. i’m single and dating so you’ll get to read about all of the crazy stories from my 30-something love-less life. i could write more, but i’m sure we’ll come to know each other better with time. best not to rush these things.

Twanna A Hines, Funky Brown Chick – photo by Bill Wadman

Twanna maintains another site at twannahines.com – a site unlike any other I’ve seen. More than a Twitter feed, less than a blog, it’s a net-bite series of snapshots of her life. The more I read of Twanna, the more impressed I am. You don’t expect deep insights from a sexblogger, usually more noted for erotic entertainment than analysis and philosophy, but here in the Huffington Post she sticks it to Steven Levitt, author of Freakonomics. Then again, she has two degrees – a BS and an MA.

A self-described sexpot, she looks good enough to eat. Her chocolate skin has sent any number of delicious thoughts scampering through my hungry mind.

She gives good blog. Well written, entertaining, punchy. Not heavy on the explicit details, but she doesn’t pull her punches – if she is sleeping with someone, she sez so. It’s more a relationship blog than a sex blog; presumably you know what to do once you’re in bed together, you don’t need to be told who put what where and how many strokes per second.

There’s a “Best of First Year” post here. Even better, there’s a “Worst of…” post the very next day. Twanna doesn’t take herself too seriously! There’s a few broken links, due to a platform change or two from Blogger to WordPress and one domain to another, but it’s not too hard to find the original posts. Better yet, just read the whole first year, skimming if you wish. Her posts aren’t long. Then read the second, third, fourth and fifth years! It’s all good.

If I have a criticism at all, it’s that the blog looks very “busy” on the page. There’s a lot going on, with advertising from various sources, an archive list as long as a short arm, a category list likewise, the posts themselves, and other bits and pieces all over. Then again, blogs that are solid slabs of text turn me off.

Twanna began blogging under the pseudonym Stollie (for Stolichnaya vodka) but gave that up after a while. She’s not the sort of person who works well with deception. She’s genuine, honest, upfront. You get a good flavor in an online interview at Clutch Magazine:

Best part about being FBC is that it’s me %100. Whether I’m church, with my friends or at work, I am Twanna Hines, Funky Brown Chick.

Twanna’s interest is in men. Young, sexy, exciting, often with a foreign accent. She has regular testosterone-based posts. Manly Mondays, Testicle Tuesdays and – sigh – Wanker Wednesdays.  I must admit to a certain level of fascination. Who will be the next man in her sights? Will she date him? How will it turn out?

Not just men and relationships, of course. For any single woman (or man) aiming to live in New York City, this blog is your homework. Native New Yorkers will have it in their genes, but Twanna moved to NYC from Chicago five years ago, and she has seen it all from an outside perspective. More outside than Chicago, actually – she’s lived here and there around the world and has insights and experience that put the frosting on top.

Sometimes her life reads a little like the script for a television series. Sexie in the City, maybe. She’s always got something on her plate, from heavy-duty writing workshops to interracial dating. There’s the flavor of an active metropolitan lifestyle. Twanna’s not writing for the sake of filling up blog pages – she’s taking time out from an actual life to fill us in on things interesting and thoughtful, entertaining and stimulating, fun and funky.

Which makes the titbits about her book all the more teasing. She’s working on the book of the blog, and unlike others I’ve seen, this won’t be just the pick of the website bound and gagged, this will have new material and a theme. Perhaps like Melissa Plaut’s Hack, where the Jewish Lesbian NYC night cabbie’s blog was transformed into a book that was edgier, more personal, more comprehensive, more coherent than the blog had ever been.

Looking forward to reviewing the book. In the meantime, Twanna’s blog has become one of my must-reads. Highly recommended for a smart, funny, literate woman’s view of life, the Big Apple, and the world.

–Guy Sez

Bonus video: FunkyBrownChick and Girl With a One-Track Mind talking at SXSW

Ladies and Gentlemens, I give you Echo Bazaar!

photo by Lotushead

Guy sez: Flirting is the gentle art of romantic pretence. I enjoy flirting with ladies of advanced years, for example, saying to them, “Oh, if only I were twenty years younger…”. The pretence is that a romantic or sexual attachment exists, and the more unlikely the possibility, the more outrageous the flirt.

It’s pointless to flirt with your partner, for example. Fun, but not really flirting if it’s a sure thing.

The spice of flirting lies in the possibility, the thought, the fantasy that it could actually come true. Say to an old age pensioner, “I’ll be round tonight with a bunch of roses and a bottle of champagne,” and everyone knows that it’s not going to happen. If I say the same thing to a single woman closer to my age, well, you never know, we could be eating our breakfast eggs together, a rose or two sprouting from an empty magnum.

Grl sez: A good friend of mine once told me that even though he was so happy in his current relationship, he would love to go back to the flirting days. I empathised – I love to flirt! I love knowing that I’m making someone feel special. Whether you’re flirting with someone just to make them smile, or to let them know you’re interested in them, it makes me feel great

I can’t help but smile when people flirt with me (well mostly anyway!) – I love knowing that someone thinks I’m attractive! Even if it’s not going to go anywhere, it still makes me tingle when someone flirts with me

Of course there’s always a flip side…I guess one of the worst is when creepy men start flirting with you at bars *shudder*. You know there’s only one thing they want, and you don’t want to give it to them!

Far worse I think though is when people you’ve broken up with start flirting with you again. An ex of mine has recently been doing this with me and it is frustrating! Especially when she was the one who told me she’d rather be friends…

Guy sez: The beauty of unwanted flirting is that it can be gently – or not so gently – turned aside. Southern ladies are wonders at rejecting advances in the most delightful way. There must be a textbook they read in school. How to charm people away.

Make it a game if you don’t want attention. Call it anti-flirting. Turn them off in the nicest way.

Perhaps your ex, Grl, flirts with you precisely because she knows it’s going nowhere. Or maybe, she thinks there’s always the chance…

That’s the spice, the sweetness, the thrill of flirting.