Grl: Guy! So nice to see you!

Guy: Yeah you too! I’ve been missing you.

Grl: been missing you too, work’s been crazy busy *long slow kiss to make up for it*

Guy: Mmmmmm. *tastes Grl’s tongue* So hard with you on the road. *runs tongue over lips* Mmmmm, barbecue.

Grl: …*sigh* I know. Jeez I miss you.

Guy: You know I want to do a post on chatsex?

Grl: yeah, I had noticed

Guy: I was wondering how we should approach it. For example, half the fun of a good chatsex session is the setting. I remember that time on a plane, in coach, redeye flight to Chicago. *wraps blanket over us*

Grl: mmmm that was fun! I still can’t believe the person sitting next to us didn’t hear anything!

Guy: *quietly undoes safety belt* We were very quiet.

Grl: *follows your example*

Guy: The crew were in the galley, doing crew things. *slides hand under blanket* Nobody noticed.

Grl: *grabbing your hand and squeezing it* Thank heavens! I might be open, but I’m not that open!

Guy: *squeezes Grl’s hand* Just holding hands is fun with you. We could just chatcuddle if you want.*slides hand around a bit under blanket*

Grl: mmm remember that time coming home from the airport?

Grl: nah, I’m too turned on to just cuddle now!

Guy: Oh, good! *hand explores under blanket* Interesting shapes under loose flight clothing.

Grl: yeah it’s all those layers of clothing I can’t fit in my suitcase anymore!  *cursing layers*

Guy: It made it difficult. Especially the oral part. Can’t believe nobody noticed.

Grl: yeah, specially with all my moaning and your heavy breathing!

Guy: *breathing heavily*

Grl: *stretching up for a kiss*

Guy: *kisses Grl with intent* I love the way you taste.

Grl: *hand creeping down*

Guy: The beauty of a good chatsex session is that you aren’t constrained by physical restrictions. Of clothing or cramped coach seats.

Grl: or the person sitting next to us Or that we weren’t even sitting remotely near each other

Guy: Or that it was a day flight. Still, we can relive the experience the way it should have been. *exploring hand at last finds some skin*

Grl: yeah, in a perfect world… *sharp breath in*

Guy: Sorry. I think that was your shoulder - I was hunting for a nipple. Ah. I wonder what happens if I press this button.

Grl: really? I could’ve sworn it was my belly!

Guy: Hard to tell in the dark, under a blanket in cramped seats. All good. *presses button* Oh look, the moon is full, the blanket is under us, the waves are crashing onto the tropic beach, the palms are waving above us in the mellow night sky. And we’re all alone. Just us. *undoes top button*

Grl: *smelling the salt air* mmmmmm

Guy: *admiring Grl* You are beautiful. *kisses Grl again*

Guy: *and again*

Guy: *undoes a few more buttons* Not as many layers of clothing in this scenario. Still, it’s fun to slowly undress you.

Grl: mmm just you wait till you hit my bathing suit. THEN you’ll be gasping! *giving a helping hand*

Guy: I’m gasping already! *removes Grl’s top and admires well-filled costume beneath*

Grl:

Guy: Just wearing board shorts myself. Getting uncomfortably tight around the front bulge area.

Grl: I can help with that *gently stroking bulge*

Guy: Yikes! The problem’s growing!

Grl: mmmmmm *sliding hand down shorts*

Guy: I’m not talking fantasy now. I wish you were doing that for real!

Grl: :D:D:D:D:D

Guy: *ignores growing tension down below*

Guy: *slides fingers over Lycra bathing suit*

Guy: *feeling interesting shapes*

Guy: The full moonlight highlights the curves. I can see clearly what is shoulder, what is belly, and what is breast. *tickles nipple through thin cloth*

Grl: Is it full tide? Cos I’m getting really wet

Guy: *slides hand downstairs*

Guy: Sure that bathing suit isn’t chafing? *Undoes cord on board shorts*

Guy: *begins wriggling free*

Grl: *grabbing your hand to stop you*

Grl: *kissing you hard*

Guy: *tasting the salt on Grl’s lips, feeling them warm and full and soft*

Grl: *sliding your shorts off*

Guy:*feeling the warm tropic air*

Guy: *rising to salute the moon*

Grl: *sitting on you and kissing you hard again*

Guy: mmmmm. *begins peeling the clinging, stretch fabric down over shoulders*

Grl: *nipples getting hard*

Guy: I can see them, trying to escape! Here, let me help! *rolls top down*

Guy: *admires perfect breasts in the pale moonlight* nipples jumping and bouncing on top, glad to be out in the open.

Grl: *kissing you again*

Grl: can you tell I like kissing

Guy: Oh yeah! Can you tell I like…

Guy: *strokes Grl’s skin* Lips, cheeks, chin, throat, shoulders. *softly, caressing, lovingly working the way down*

Grl: *breathing harder all of a sudden*

Guy: *still kissing Grl*

Guy: *breathing faster*

Grl: *heart racing*

Grl: *sliding down your body to lightly tease your cock*

Guy: *moans*

Grl: *grins*

Grl: *peeling bathing suit completely off*

Guy: *moans louder* OMG, you are beautiful! A goddess in the moonlight!

Grl: *kissing you hard*

Grl: *tongue sliding into your mouth*

Guy: *sliding fingers gently down, over shoulders, over arms*

Grl: *gasping*

Guy: *tracing the outlines of your upper body*

Guy: *backs of hands gently touching sides of breasts, almost by accident*

Grl: *kissing down the side of your neck*

Guy: *feeling nipples hard against my hands*

Guy: *stroking breasts, circling in on each side, fingers climbing those rounded slopes*

Guy: *reaching the little peaks at the centre, feeling them crinkle under his gentle touch*

Guy: *bends down to kiss them*

Grl: *kissing down your shoulder, down to your nipple, down, down, down*

Guy: *nibbling Grl’s nipples, circling them with tongue strokes*

Grl: oh god

Guy: Funny, I was thinking the same thing… Don’t you love the way that in chat, there’s no awkwardness as hands, mouths, tongues, bodies writhe and move into impossible positions?

Grl: mmm yeah!

Grl: *feeling nipples get even harder*

Grl: *moaning*

Guy: *kissing even harder*

Guy: *moves hands down, gliding lightly over the delighting curves of breasts and tummy*

Grl: *getting wetter and wetter*

Guy: *circling lower, feeling the first soft curls under his fingers*

Guy: *stroking down onto thighs*

Guy: *feeling the smooth shapes of legs, the angles of knees, the trim calves, the toes, taking time to tickle each one*

Grl: tease *kissing you hard again*

Grl: *sliding down over bump to kneel over your legs*

Guy: *responding to the kiss*

Guy: *growing harder yet*

Grl: *taking you in my mouth*

Guy: Oh my god! *closes eyes in delight*

Grl: *wondering what to do next* :p

Guy: It’s all good here. ;D

Grl: *s-l-o-w-l-y dragging lips down*

Guy: *hands moving back up legs, tracing the contours, teasing the inner thighs*

Guy: *tickling your fancy*

Guy: Gently, lightly touching just the curls.

Guy: At first…

Guy: *Stroking the triangular outlines, just lightly touching the skin*

Grl: *tongue teasing, tantalizing*

Grl: *taking your hands in mine*

Grl: *holding them still*

Guy: *enjoying the sensations of lips and tongue on me here, and the feel of female curves under my hands there*

Grl: *dragging lips up again and off completely*

Grl: *tongue circling tip*

Grl: *sliding in to you as far as I can*

Grl: *putting you back into my mouth*

Grl: *tongue moving around inside mouth*

Grl: you still there?

Guy: Oh yeah!

Guy: Wondering what to do with his hands…

Guy: Thinking of something…

Guy: *gently eases thighs apart*

Guy: *softly but firmly, unticklingly, strokes the curving shapes of outer lips*

Guy: *tracing their outlines, feeling the curls against his fingers, the soft, smooth surfaces of inner lips*

Guy: *Gently touching, sliding along the skin, slick with girl juice*

Guy: *Moves around, kissing his way down*

Grl: *coming up to kiss you again*

Guy: *meet’s Grl’s lips halfway*

Guy: *tasting the salty tang*

Guy: *holding you close*

Guy: *embracing Grl, skin to skin, head to toe*

Guy: *heart pounding*

Grl: *sliding a finger inside myself, then putting it in your mouth while we kiss*

Guy: Oh yes! Mmmmmmm. Tangy. Tasty. *sucks on finger*

Grl: *kissing the side of your mouth, then continuing to kiss around to your ear while you suck my finger*

Guy: *feeling Grl blow in ear* I hear the sea!

Guy: *takes Grl’s hand, moves it down, down, all the way down* Say hello to the boys! But don’t squeeze them too hard!

Guy: *slides his own hand way down*

Grl: *nibbling your ear lobe* :p

Guy: *slides one finger inside*

Guy: *gently*

Guy: *moves it around*

Guy: *moves it out*

Guy: *tracing the soft folds*

Guy: *finding that little bean of pleasure*

Guy: *stroking it softly with moist finger tip*

Guy: *smooth, gentle touches*

Grl: *deep sharp breath*

Grl: *gently tickling balls*

Guy: *breathing hard* Oh yes!

Guy: *moves down*

Guy: *kissing his way down*

Guy: *all the way down*

Grl: *toes curling*

Guy: *kissing into the triangle of curls*

Guy: *tongue seeking out the tender, tangy, places*

Guy: *kissing, licking, softly at first*

Guy: *tongue touching, stroking, caressing clitoris*

Guy: *darting inside*

Grl: oh god oh god ohgod *arching up for more contact*

Guy: *pushing harder*

Guy: *kissing away, away up*

Guy: *sliding himself in*

Guy: *feeling the grip inside*

Guy: The most intimate of caresses, enjoying every inch of the journey.

Grl: *crying out*

Guy: *thrusting slowly, all the way in*

Guy: *holding it a moment*

Guy: *pulling back*

Guy: *And in again*

Guy: *feeling the pleasure, the exquisite pleasure*

Guy: *gently, firmly thrusting in a slow rhythm*

Guy: Matching the waves on the beach. We’re on a beach, there’s a blanket under us, the warm air is caressing our skin and we have the island to ourselves and all the time in the world.

Guy: *pushing in and out, a steady tempo*

Grl: *feeling you inside me*

Grl: *kissing you hard*

Grl: *and again*

Grl: *and again*

Grl: *and again*

Grl: *over and over*

Guy: *responding to kisses*

Guy: sweet kisses in the silver moonlight

Guy: *continuing a steady stroke*

Guy: *pushing down, pressure on clitoris as well*

Guy: *Making every movement count for the maximum in shared pleasure*

Grl: *getting closer to that edge*

Guy: The pressure is building for me. *pushing on, sweet sensations growing*

Grl: *fingers busy here*

Guy: *Thrusting quicker now, in and down*

Guy: The waves seem to be rolling in, crashing ashore, the universe moving faster as we move in harmony.

Guy: *feeling the exquisite pleasure with every rhythmic movement of our shared bodies moving as one*

Guy: *Sliding in and out, surfing the rising pleasure*

Grl: *inches from the edge*

Guy: *feeling Grl moan and tense and writhe under him*

Guy: *loving her with every breath, every beat of his racing heart*

Guy: *holding her close, every inch of her body, every point of pleasure, every pore in her skin*

Grl: *moaning loudly*

Guy: *breathing hard*

Guy: *thrusting in, sliding in, filling her up*

Guy: *pushing on and on, breath in gasps, heart in harness*

Guy: *moving together in a race, two working as one, hearts and limbs entwined*

Guy: *each feeling the other’s every move, every thrust, every precious pressure*

Guy: *temperature soaring, skins slick with sweat*

Grl: *crying out*

Guy: The feeling is unstoppable, the rythmn pounding

Guy: Working together, breath coming in shorter and shorter gasps.

Guy: *thrusting, grinding, riding, moving together in a dance of joy*

Grl: *can’t think mind off in space body in exquisite pleasure*

Guy: *unstoppable waves of pleasure pulsing through me*

Guy: *arches back in a climax of ecstasy*

Guy: *gasping at the pleasure*

Guy: *gulping in air to cool his body, furnace-hot in the tropic night*

Guy: *slowing and stopping, just pressing down*

Guy: *enjoying the aftertingles*

Guy: *feeling the shared bliss*

Guy: *holds Grl close, this most intimate embrace*

Grl: *breathing gradually slowing down*

Guy: *feeling the shared warmth*

Guy: *rolls out, lies gasping*

Guy: *smiling*

Guy: happy beyond belief

Guy: *holding Grl’s hand*

Guy: *touching her fingers*

Guy: *feeling so close, so loving, so happy*

Grl: *bringing your hand to my mouth and kissing it*

Guy: *kissing Grl’s hand*

Guy: *sighs in happiness*

Guy: *looking at Grl’s loving face*

Guy: this is heaven

Grl: mmmmmmmm

Guy: you are amazing

Grl: I love you

Guy: I love you

Grl: enjoy?

Guy: Oh yes

Guy: We’ll have to do that chatsex post one day, you know. It won’t write itself!

She’s from back East – Berkeley – but we won’t hold that against her. Too much.

So don’t think we’ve gone to sleep on you. We’re just catching our breath, and we’ll be coming back quicker and fresher. Stay tuned for more.

Grl, I’m sad to say, is now on the road, and out of immediate physical contact. Maybe it’s time for a post on chatsex…

–Guy Sez

Handsfree love – photo by Jasmaine Mathews.

Guy Sez: I’m no stranger to conducting a romantic relationship over vast distances, what with Grl being away on the other side of the ocean – in Sausalito – but the link is going to become even more fragile in a week or three.

Grl is heading off into the world on a roaming assignment that will take her to exotic places like Oklahoma City, Washington DC, and Horton MO. It could last for months.

What’s a guy to do? There’s a limit on how many weekends I can fly away, and while it’s tempting to just gas up the ‘Stang and hit Route 66 east for my kicks, that’s a terrible strain on a guy and his auto.

Worth it. My favorite place in all the world is beside Grl, but how embarrassing is it to jump into bed and fall fast asleep, to be woken up two hours later for the long drive home?

The ever-popular nude mutual pleasure video chat session is good for relief. A bandwidth muncher, and while it’s good to hear (and see) the moaning in real time, I also get moaning later on from the landlady, who provides the supposedly unlimited wi-fi. Mrs Madrigal she’s not!

There’s only so far you can go on a phone call, and while scented love letters may be romantic, they take time. Truth to tell, Grl and I send messages via chocolate and saucey books. “Read page 43 and think of me,” she’ll scribble on the flyleaf, totally destroying the value on the second-hand market.* A recent package containing mango slices raised more than a smile.

Chatsex is cheap and easy, though best advised not to begin a session on your iPhone while coming home on the Muni. Voice of experience here. Pick your place. We might have a longer post on the ins and outs of chatsex later on, possibly in the form of some actual Grl/Guy chat in about oh, four weeks time. Amazing how an innocent chat can suddenly turn steamy. *Nibbles on Grl’s ear*, you say, and before you know it, buttons are coming loose, clothes disappear into chat-ether, hands move lower, tongues become involved, there’s some heavy thrusting action and you look up to find you’ve missed your stop and you’re down at Fisherman’s Wharf with a bus load of tourists aiming cameras at you.

Txting is always nice. So good to get a quick well-chosen txt from your lover. I<3U needs no translation.

“Absence makes the heart grow fonder,” they always say, and it’s true enough. Something else they say is, “If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with.” That sort of thing makes you change your FaceBook status to “It’s complicated”.

We shall see. This blog might become a whole lot more interesting over the weeks and months ahead!

–Guy Sez

* Or possibly enhancing it. Don’t you just love books where the good bits are all marked?